Gone

Picture belongs to Keely Varada. Click photo to follow the link.

Adam is gone. Gone away to England. His grandmother died and the jewish tradition means they got to bury her fast. She is gone. And Adam is mourning. He is so far away from me, but even when he was still here in Sweden, he felt distant, being gone, hiding in the depths that exists in his head. He are the love of my life, and I want to help him feel better. I have cleaned at home, bought him a red rose bush, hugged him, kissed him, waved him good bye, and sent small texts to him, saying how much I love him and how much I miss him.

But it is not enough. Not anything I say, or do will make him feel better. Get over this pain. He won’t. Losing someone is not something you get over. You just learn how to live with it. He has to live with this pain, and I do not want him too. I want to turn back the time, and then stop it, so that he never will feel it. Ever. But that moment is also gone. I can’t erase his grandmother’s death.

The past is gone, he can only look ahead. On the future. A future without his grandmother, only a red rose bush and a baby on the way. I water his rose bush for him, until he comes home. Keeping it alive. That is all I can do for him. The time of no pain, are gone.

 

8 comments

  1. Tack så mycket! Vad var det för produkter som hade stark lukt? Jag har inte tänkt på det själv så blir nyfiken, alltid bra med lite research. Men vad tungt, både för Adam och dig. Styrkekramar till er!

  2. Heat lotionen har ju lite linimentdoft över sig så det kan jag förstå. Propolis har hjälpt min hy så enormt men den doftar kanske lite den med, men mest honung tycker jag🙂 så fint att du köpt Adam en rosbuske, det är en fin gest och även om det inte läker såren så lindrar det lite i taget. Kramar

    1. Tror säkert de är bra, min bästa vän älskar de produkterna, men jag har jättesvårt för starka dofter tyvärr. Lite tråkigt faktiskt. Och ja, han blev jätteglad för rosenbusken, då rosor är hans favoriter, och han länge velat ha en planta. Mer älskad växt har jag aldrig sett maken till!

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